22 things I have done since becoming a parent…

Sung’ Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star’ more times than I’d like to think about.
Not had a lie-in past 9am for over 8 years, but had plenty of mid-day naps.
Scrubbed Weet-Bix off the kitchen floor till my hands nearly bled (that stuff is like cement to shift when it has set!).
Got up in the middle of the night to squirt milk from painfully engorged breasts, because baby has slept for a change.
Carried a hungry baby under one arm, a screaming toddler under the other, whilst pushing a buggy out of Central Library, down a lift and to the car. Once at the car baby was fed and toddler wet herself in the car!
Cleaned up all manner of body fluids from a multitude of surfaces.
Spent many a night laying next to one of my children pretending to be asleep in the hope they would drift off.
Tried baby rice cereal and don’t recommend it.
Played airplane with a spoon.
Gone out with cooking flour handprints on my clothes, paint in my hair and glitter on my face – all without realizing.
Breastfed whilst sitting on the toilet.
Not moved, when needing to urgently pee, because of a sleeping baby on my lap on a long-haul flight. I have also slept in the most contorted positions with a baby asleep on me – just so the baby would stay asleep and I could rest a little.
Emptied a full vacuum bag to find a tiny piece of Lego.
Taken a screw driver to Barbie’s legs to replace a battery, so she would work as a remote control on a Barbie DVD.
Chopped up over 30 onions in one night for a Kindi sausage sizzle fund-raiser.
Dashed around the supermarket blowing raspberries, singing songs and pretending my trolley is a Formula 1 racing car.
Let my children use my face and body as a canvas with body paints.
Danced and sang at times of the day, and in certain public places, that before having children I wouldn’t have even thought about (unless under the influence of a large quantity of alcohol – those were the days when I could drink!).
Quit smoking and can no longer handle my drink (half a glass of wine is my limit!).
Worn clothes for the sole purpose of easy accessibility of baby to breast, whilst being as discreet as possible.
Squeezed through tunnels at playgrounds, whilst being heavily pregnant, at the orders of a 2 year old.
Spent a ridiculous number of hours, over the past 8 years, documenting all the fun, crazy, sometimes challenging and sad, moments of family life in this blog. I could have been doing yoga, learning to sew or knit (or both!), reading quality literature, playing the piano… but, I love this record of our lives. I look back on it often, as do the rest of the family. It gives me strength and reminds me of what’s important. It helps me laugh at the bad times, with hindsight, and treasure the good times.